Content note: this episode discusses pet loss, including the death of my dog Orlando and some details about how he died. There are also brief mentions of losing my mum and a friend. Please take care of yourself and choose another episode if today isn’t the right day for this one.

This week I’m answering a listener question about grief and pet loss, and I’m sharing the full story of Orlando, my dog of 15 years who passed away this winter.

I talk about how I adopted him at 25 and what those years together really taught me about love, responsibility, presence and care. I’m honest about the things I got right and the things I regret, because I think we need more truthful conversations about the relationships we have with animals and what we owe them.

I also share what the last months of his life looked like, how he came to my 40th birthday and seemed to hold on just for that, and how he died peacefully at home with me beside him.

In the second half I reflect on what grieving him has felt like, especially sitting alongside the loss of my mum in 2024. I think about the difference between anticipatory grief and sudden loss, why pet loss often goes unrecognised as a real grief, and some of the small rituals that have helped me carry him with me.

If you’ve lost an animal companion, I hope this gives you a little space to feel it.

You can send me a speakpipe question over here: https://speakpipe.com/yarrowm

and you can join the free soft grief space here: https://griefmagic.com/free/

Love,

Yarrow